Ep 13 - Nikki's Boons, To Serve and Inspire

[00:00:03] Hi everyone, and welcome to the Monomyth Diaries, a podcast where ordinary people get to share their hero's journey. I'm Mandi And I'm Karen, and we'll be your hosts. We'll discover powerful insights, critical moments of growth, and much more. Thanks for joining us. We all have a monomyth to share, and someone out there needs to hear it. Welcome back to another episode of Monomyth Diaries, where it's a take what you like and leave the rest podcast. We're pleased to have Nikkie back with us.

[00:00:32] In our previous episode, Nikkie shared about how she grew in her relationship with God through her relationship with others. Thank you everyone for joining with us again. So Nikkie, looking back on your journey, what do you think was the most pivotal moment in your transformation? If I had to just pick a moment, I mean, I would probably say the most pivotal was probably that time in college during my freshman year where I was just really seeking God, and all along he was seeking me, and you know, found me there at the MSC.

[00:01:02] That was probably the most life-changing moment. You gave a lifelong friend, too. I did. Well, actually, it's funny. I don't know the girl who actually sat at the table, but the girl whose party, Heather, she, yes. You know, but, um, yes, I still, I can't even remember the name of the, of the girl who came and sat at the table with me sharing about that, but she changed my life. Yeah, that's right. That's right. It's so funny how God, like, sends random people that we would never, ever guess. That's right.

[00:01:30] How do you think embracing your faith affected your self-worth and your purpose in life? It affected it, and kind of like we talked about in the first episode, that I am loved despite what I do, and so I don't have to earn love.

[00:01:46] I don't have to earn favor. I'm a child of God's, and he loves me just as is, and so that's probably the most freeing, and also like we talked about that when I do things that are good or that please God, it's from a motivation of pure just like gratitude and freedom. It's not, I'm doing good things because I'm trying to prove that I'm a good person to myself or anyone else. That's probably the biggest.

[00:02:14] Can you talk about some of the boons you've experienced as a result of your relationship with God? My relationship with God that I get to have and with other people, which is totally different than if I didn't know God. And so, kind of like I said, it's that like freedom to just really love people for who they are and not for what people can do for you because you don't need anything because God's given you all that you need.

[00:02:40] And so it really comes out of a much more pure place where if I didn't have God in my life and have that then I'd be operating on a much more selfish, prideful kind of framework that I'm freed from having to do now. Get a sense that there's a lot of trust. There's no agendas. Exactly. This feels so much more peaceful. Yes, absolutely. Yeah, a different kind of life. What do you think has changed the most for you over the years? Probably going back to that giving up control.

[00:03:08] You know, I think each of us are born into a family dynamic that goes back probably generations and generations of how you kind of operate. And for my family, and probably most people, they want to feel this sense of control of their life just to quiet down the fears that they have. And so I was born into a family that really was a very controlling family.

[00:03:35] And that's something that was a struggle because my like my mom's parents were alcoholics and her life was out of control. So trying to gain that control and kind of guide your future. And so for me, that's been the biggest thing is God saying, I have got you and I've got your future. And you don't have to manipulate and control things to get to some outcome. You can live in freedom and peace and love. That's, you know, a totally different mentality that I think a lot of people live in.

[00:04:05] It's a daily struggle. Yeah, yeah. And it's a daily struggle still for me, you know, because you tend to like revert back to, you know, that mode of operation that you were kind of born into. And so that's why I think it's so important. I mean, for me personally, to be in God's word and with his people to renew my mind and remind myself of the reality and not going back and living in that bondage that I was born into. You were also talking about like how parenting is hard.

[00:04:33] Do you find that peace kind of helps transform your relationship with your kids? It does. There's been a lot of times where I've had to go back and apologize to my kids for parenting out of fear and control and letting them know I'm just a human too, you know, and I make mistakes just like you do.

[00:04:55] And it comes, you know, out of a place of wanting the best for them, but it's reminding myself that's not how God operates and that's not how he works with us either. He doesn't try to control and manipulate us. He gives us free will. And so I'm constantly having to renew my mind. How does God's kingdom work? How does, you know, his ways work? And getting in line with that instead of trying to get him, God, and other people in line with how my ways work.

[00:05:20] I'm feeling so convicted as you're speaking right now, like, because I am trying to give my own son autonomy. Yeah. It's frightening, especially when they're teenagers. And then sometimes you see them making choices and you're like, I feel good about that. Yeah. But what you said earlier was like, it's not about me. And it's a fine line of when you're parenting on how much do you, you know, come in and guide and how much do you hands off and let them kind of figure some things out.

[00:05:49] And that's where I think coming like dependence on God and asking him daily for wisdom on what do you want me to do, God? You know what needs to be done. Show me. Those other days I'm like, oh my God, you're the greatest parent, not me. Yeah. Can you share any specific experience where you felt God's presence or guidance strongly? You know, we're talking about community and people and I love being with my community. But there are times where I do like to just get away from everything.

[00:06:18] And my parents in the last few years since COVID, they got some land out in LaGrange and there's nothing there. There's no house, there's no toilet or sewer or anything like that. But I will just go out there sometimes for a couple of hours, sometimes overnight. And a lot of times just bring my Bible and a pen, a journal and like a chair and sit out there and just nature and just away from all like the distractions of daily life.

[00:06:47] And sometimes that's where I can feel God just the most in that I can listen to him in his word, but I also see his word in nature. That's an expression of who he is and his creativity. That's where I really feel like I can hear from God and everything's quiet and I can hear his still small voice, you know, and I'm not in the chaos. I wish I was a journaler. Yeah. I have tried so many times. I'll get you out there on the land with me and get your pop of your chair.

[00:07:17] We'll see. Yeah. I'm going to take you up on that. How would you encourage someone listening to begin their own journey of finding faith? One of the biggest things is to let go of your agenda. I think when a lot of times when you're seeking truth, you really aren't yours.

[00:07:35] You already know like what you want to be true and you're seeking people and things to support your truth, which is oftentimes something that you feel like you can wrap your head around and you can control. But with God, a relationship and a journey with him is scary because his truth is oftentimes not your truth. And you're going to be challenged in many ways.

[00:08:01] And so I think on that journey, being open to saying, God, I just want to know what the truth is. I don't want to know what my truth is or this person's truth or this person's truth. I want to know what your truth is, what reality is. And so please show me whatever that is. And no matter how scary that is, please, I want to be open to that. And that's hard because you're going to be real vulnerable.

[00:08:25] And that is part of the walk is being open to God coming in and speaking truth into your life. And sometimes there's some things you don't want to hear. That's part of it is he doesn't want just part of you. He wants all of you. And so he's going to challenge you and bring some things up that he wants you to face so that you can be truly free. That is so humble. I have to ask you this.

[00:08:50] When you're in that situation where you have a personal condition about something and God's going, no, you need to drop that. Yeah. How do you handle that? It's hard. And sometimes I don't do the right thing at that moment. I feel like God's so gentle though with us all and that he doesn't come and just like hit us over the head with a hammer. I feel like he just does these little gradual pulls, nudges, puts people in your path. Yeah.

[00:09:19] It's sometimes hard because you get hit with some, some truths, but it's never in a demeaning. God never does it to like hurt you or demeaning you. It's always to have you live your best life and your best self. That's what he's calling you to. It's not to condemn you because that's not what he came to do. How do you differentiate the voices? I'm sorry. Just being very like I'm searching here. So, well, one of the things I, that is useful is does it line up with God's word?

[00:09:47] Cause there's a lot of messages out in the world. And so when I think I'm hearing God speak, the first tool I use is, is this contrary to his word? Is this saying something different than what his word says? Cause he's not going to say something contrary to his word. That's the first indicator. Does it line up with who he is and his message? And if it does it, then I know that that's not from him. That's from Satan trying to like condemn or shame me and make me feel bad. God doesn't do that. God is always a loving father. And if he disciplines me, it's for my own good.

[00:10:17] It's not to shame me. That's a great tool. Yeah. So you hear the voices and you go to your Bible. Yeah. That's so beautiful. Um, so Nikki, how has your faith journey impacted your community and the lives of those around you? Hopefully in good ways. I mean, again, it's freeing to be in a relationship with God where I don't have to be in charge of the results. Like I just want to be faithful to what he's called me to this day and to love the people he's put in front of me.

[00:10:47] And then he'll do what he will with that. I think it's been amazing to get, to be a part of what God's already doing. It's not me. It's just what he's already doing and just coming alongside and saying, here in God, where, where do you want to use me today in your big plan? And it's been amazing just through the, the workout community. Yeah. Let's talk about that a little bit. Yeah. Yeah. I wanted to bring that up and make sure that we talk about that. That's a huge way that you're giving back to the community. The workout community.

[00:11:13] What's amazing about it is it's just women building up other women. We, we come together and it, you know, we talk about, it's more than a workout. It's a community where we get to encourage one another and share with one another. And what is this workout group called? So this is, it's called F4. So it's free fitness for females. And it is, it's absolutely free. There is no cost to attend any of these workouts.

[00:11:39] We meet usually three times a week and there's varying times and locations. And we do a 45 minute workout. And then we have, we end with what we call caught circle of trust. And we get to the person who led the workout gets to share a word that is on their heart to just build up the community of ladies. And we get a time of just praying for each other and we get to lift each other up.

[00:12:03] And it's, it's just a great way to love on the women of the community and just help make our lives a little bit easier. We're carrying each other's burdens together. That's all run on volunteers. Yep. All volunteers. No one makes a dime. And you have been a giant part of starting this. A group of you. A group. Yeah. I mean, it really is. It's all like, no one could do this on their own. It is a village of beautiful women coming together and using their gifts to build up and encourage other people.

[00:12:32] And so it's absolutely a village of ladies, beautiful ladies coming together to create this. No one could do this on their own. And that's how we met. Absolutely. And that's, I mean, you did a huge part of my spiritual path and you had no idea you were going to do that. No. No, I did not. Yeah. Yeah. It's an incredible group. That's an incredible thing that you're doing in the community. Thank you. No, thank you. Yeah. I've gone a couple of times and I still remember times like, oh, Nikki's leading it. I'm going to be sore after that.

[00:13:01] But one thing that really stood out about me about this group is how it's leading women from all different walks, like different nationalities, culture and backgrounds, and everyone's welcoming. Even different faiths even. That's right. And that's so amazing to see in action. And everyone's encouraging. Encouraging and feel safe. And I had one of the ladies talking about how she loved how when we come together, it's not judgy.

[00:13:28] She has a lot of other, you know, women organizations I think she's part of. She feels women are kind of sizing you up, judging you. And she's like, I do not feel that at a four at all. I just feel like accepted and loved and encouraged. I love that. That makes my heart feel so good that that's what people are coming away feeling. Yeah, it has completely changed my life. You've changed my life. And I appreciate that. It's a blessing. Like I said, God's just working through all of us, you know, and we just get to be a part of that, which is awesome.

[00:13:57] But it's all him, you know, it comes from him, all the good things. And so we just get to be vessels. I love that word, vessels. Yeah, I think we don't stand favorite people. Vessels. So in the mom of the diaries, we like to end our journeys with the spirit of gratitude. Yeah. So Nikki, is there anyone you would like to give a shout out to? I mean, there's so many people I would love to give a shout out to because like I said, where I am now is accumulation of all this different impact that different people have had in my life.

[00:14:27] And with you remove any one, you know, person or set of people and I would probably be influenced in different ways or impacted in different ways in a negative way. And so I can be thankful to, you know, obviously my parents and my spouse and my kids and all my wonderful ladies, but I'll probably give today a big shout out to Mandy just because it was, and I know you said I've changed your life and encouraged you, but you have encouraged me.

[00:14:56] So much with your words of encouragement. And so it's so funny. You're like saying, Oh, you bless me, but you have truly blessed me and stretch me in ways. And even being here, you know, when you first brought this up, I was just kind of like, I don't think so. Very hesitant. And you really did encourage me and stretch me in ways to do some things that I never would have probably even thought to do. So I'm very thankful for you.

[00:15:23] You've blessed me probably every ounce as much as I've blessed you and God's used you in my life as an encouragement. So I'm very appreciative and thankful that he brought you into my life. Oh, and that's you now to cry. So. All right. Well, thank you. Yeah. Actually, that's the first time I think ever on our podcast. So many of you have been making history that maybe was actually lifted up directly. Please. Thank you. Thank you for taking me to lift them. That's right.

[00:15:51] Any other people you want to give shout out to? So my beautiful workout community and the ladies that I've been discipling. We've been discipling our kids. We actually a group, my Sunday school group. There's six of us ladies who all have girls that are seniors this year. Wow. We have been meeting with them since they were in the fifth grade, our daughters and us together. And honestly, I don't know if I could have made it through parenting without them.

[00:16:19] We've just been like each other's, you know, shoulder to cry on when it's gotten hard and rock. And so, again, just having a community of people that to do life with is we need that. Yes. We need that. So, yeah, we call ourselves the churchy mamas. And so, shout out to the churchy mamas. I love that. All right. Any other burning desires? I think that's it. Really appreciate y'all having me on the show. Yeah. Very glad you were brave and did it. Yeah. Yeah.

[00:16:48] So, truly honored, you know, that you've been so brave to share your story. I know that sometimes it's difficult. Yeah. I know your story is going to definitely inspire people who are listening, help navigate their own journey. So, thank you. We want to take a moment to thank Nikki for sharing her model myth with us today. Her story of seeking faith, overcoming challenges, and stepping into her purpose is a beautiful reminder that growth often begins in the most difficult moments.

[00:17:12] Nikki, your willingness to be open and vulnerable not only inspires us, but creates hope for others who may be navigating their own journeys. To our incredible audience, your continued support and engagement mean the world to us. Together, we are building a space where every story matters and every voice contributes to the collective journey. We'd appreciate it if you could take a moment and rate and review the podcast. It helps us reach more people with stories of transformation and growth.

[00:17:39] You can visit us at monomythdiaries.com or text us directly from the show notes to reach out and keep the conversations going. Until next time, heroes, let's journey together through our monomyths.